Offensive Driving in Phoenix

Offensive Driving

Because "#@%! YOU" was already taken

(Ob)Seen Around Town

Stretching to find a positive side: at least this Hummer’s owner isn’t a hypocrite. Notice that his vanity plate doesn’t try to throw you off the track, so to speak, with a tag like “NATRLVR” or “MYTOY.”

He knows his vehicle gets about 10 mpg in town. He understands that his CO2 emissions are about twice those of a normal car. He isn’t denying that his Hummer is a smog machine on wheels that makes life miserable for the thousands of kids in Phoenix who suffer from asthma and other respiratory illnesses. He knows his Hummer contributes more than its fair share to the infamous Brown Cloud of Phoenix, a layer of minute carbon particles and nitrogen dioxide trapped by cold air during the winter.

He knows all this. He just doesn’t care.

Welfare Hummers

The Phoenix Brown Cloud

He probably will care when we get around to making the price of combustion reflect the cost of combustion. Right now, we — all of us — subsidize gas-guzzlers. I’m sure ECOTHIS doesn’t see himself as getting handouts, but he is. When kids have an asthma attack brought on by smog, ECOTHIS doesn’t pay a dime toward the doctor’s bill. When the hottest summer on record last year caused cases of heat stroke to spike, ECOTHIS didn’t have to pay the hospitals that treated the many indigent patients for free — despite his generous contributions to green house gases that are driving temperatures here up and up.

He won’t care until he’s taken off the public dole. Until then, he’ll tool around Phoenix, thumbing his nose at the rest of us poor schmucks, enjoying his Hummer Freeloader.

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